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about smartcookie

i write about what goes on in my life. i write about things i think are funny. i write nonsense. i write about bodily functions.

i have a boyfriend/husband named nathan who loves video games. we get along great. about 7% of the time. any percentage greater is purely a curious statistical anomaly.
aww i love nate!

and as our story progresses, you may wonder who i'm talking about.

aside from courageous nathan, our main characters include:
oh. and i teach dance and like accounting. the end.

people i read

oh joy
seth godin
not martha
ikea hacker
ad goodness
oh happy day
design sponge
steamy kitchen
a softer world
the superficial
go fug yourself
marmaduke explained

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counter statistics

Saturday, January 27, 2007
105C. cooking.

remember that time when phil and sara cooked sushi and set off our fire alarm while i was in the shower?

oh yeah. that was today.

wait, isn't the principle of sushi that it is RAW, meaning UNCOOKED? you might think so. this was saraphilred sushi meaning it was cooked (and now that i'm done being mean, it was pretty good) and cooked in smoke-inducing sesame oil.

so when the alarm went off and i got out of the shower, we headed downstairs feeling pretty guilty only to see our neighbors standing off to the side. our original plan was to act like we had no idea that sushi cooking could lead to the alarms, but then two cop cars pulled up and one officer got out asking "anybody cooking?" phil had no choice but to meekly raise his hand and admit our sushi smoking ordeal.

"105C. cooking." said the office into his radio.

Cait* 4:37 PM link it! 0 comments

Monday, January 22, 2007
one cool thing about graduating

is i'll be the first person in my family to get a 4-year college degree.

Cait* 8:26 PM link it! 0 comments

Sunday, January 21, 2007
i'ma hustler baby, i just want you to know

best line of the weekend is rick referring to me singing that repetoire of songs i only remember when i'm drunk:
"dude, its like you've got the world's worst mixed tape in your back seat."
who wouldn't love my jumbled mix of sublime's greatest hits, jay-z's 'i just wanna love you', akon's 'smack that' and 'it's a beautiful morning' (only one verse or chorus of each repeated, except for 'i just wanna love you', which i know all the words to)? apparently rick and nate.

Cait* 3:56 PM link it! 0 comments

Saturday, January 13, 2007
boiled cowboy

if you're wondering about the title 'boiled cowboy', it is derived from an email, no doubt spam, that i happened to receive with the subject line of "boiled cowboy". i think the spammers are getting more clever. or something. i have to admit i was intrigued by the thought of some run-down bar on the outside of paris creating a disgusting drink that mocked Americans and naming it "boiled cowboy". [American tourist mistakenly enters bar. "Give him ze drink of ze house", says burly french lumberjack*. American foolishly drinks a disgusting combination of horse urine and frog leg juice, topped off with an ounce of whiskey. Spitting it out, he gags "what is this stuff?!". A chorus of French men: "we call it ze boil-ed cowboy! hon hon hon" (hearty french laughter).]

boiled cowboy is at least better than "we delivver drug$ anywhere" or "are u happy" and slightly better than "whoop reinstatement" which i hope is about the song "whoop there it is" being reinstated in the radio station playlists.

schitzophrenia ferret
strawberry-blonde avocado pit
loyal blood clot
Re: Your cows!

*do they have lumberjacks in france? Googling "french lumberjack" brought me to this amazing site: Pierre the French Lumberjack. "Steals shoelaces, stole a death ray to take over the world. Pierre is a big fan of pancakes." No factual pages came up on the topic of french forestry, but I bet there are some. Maybe just Québécois lumberjacks.

**am i the only one whole looks through their spam folder? i have this fear that something incredibly important has been filtered and consequently, i look through each and every message title to make sure its not important.

Cait* 11:02 AM link it! 0 comments

Monday, January 08, 2007
ho hum

so now that i have officially finished watching all two and a half seasons of Lost, i can resume my normal postings. i think i'm a little out of practice.. or my life is just horribly boring. i pick the latter.

1. i have made and broken my new year's resolution in 4 days. i made a resolution to 'take a picture every day' in an attempt to use my camera more, take more pictures in general and to improve the kind of pictures i've seen. i have not taken a picture since january 5th. is this because my battery died or i simply forgot? no! it's because i have nothing to take a picture of.. who wants to look at pictures of houseplants, other parts of my house or me over and over? no one! not even me! horribly boring. only explanation for it.

2. when people ask what i did over break, the only thing i can say is 'i went to a museum'.

3. i get excited when my dad brings home work that i can help him with. i got to make a video for the mini cooper showroom (just a bunch of pictures set to music) and was up all night working on it because it was the most exciting thing i had done in days.

4. making slideshow DVDs bring me excitement. after the mini cooper one, i made one for heather's wedding and for last year's recital.

5. i read cookbooks at night.

do you really need more evidence?!

i need an action plan to make my life more exciting. but you know i'll just sleep in until noon and miss whatever i planned so what's the point.

oh, 6. watching over 40 hours of lost

Cait* 12:13 PM link it! 0 comments

Tuesday, January 02, 2007
merry belated christmas

fifteen years ago this could as well be me.

ok so like five years ago this could be me:

Cait* 11:59 PM link it! 0 comments