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about smartcookie

i write about what goes on in my life. i write about things i think are funny. i write nonsense. i write about bodily functions.

i have a boyfriend/husband named nathan who loves video games. we get along great. about 7% of the time. any percentage greater is purely a curious statistical anomaly.
aww i love nate!

and as our story progresses, you may wonder who i'm talking about.

aside from courageous nathan, our main characters include:
oh. and i teach dance and like accounting. the end.

people i read

oh joy
seth godin
not martha
ikea hacker
ad goodness
oh happy day
design sponge
steamy kitchen
a softer world
the superficial
go fug yourself
marmaduke explained

January 2006
February 2006
March 2006
April 2006
May 2006
June 2006
July 2006
August 2006
September 2006
October 2006
November 2006
December 2006
January 2007
February 2007
March 2007
April 2007
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July 2007
August 2007
September 2007
October 2007
November 2007
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January 2008
February 2008
March 2008
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November 2008
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October 2009
July 2012
counter statistics

Tuesday, October 24, 2006

so today i invented a sweet game.

it has to be played while walking somewhere where there are alot of people, such as while walking home from the CFA. whenever someone crosses your path, you have to start walking like them until a new person crosses your path. not only do you have to walk like them, but you have to impersonate their emotion / facial expressions. so much fun.

today i got to be: a bitchy girl on her cell phone* (lots of angry arm and hand motions, extra points for scowling at passerbys), confused-looking guy (much head swiveling with blank stare), person shuffling to class with head down, business-y walker (purse held tightly, brisk strides, look important).

does this make me a creepy stalker? a creepy walker stalker? probably just creepy.

*nate, don't even say it.

in other news, i made a fort.

Cait* 3:39 PM link it! 0 comments

108D shenanigans

ben: whatever happened to bombing? i mean, really, when did bombing go out of style?


nate [whilst tying my scarf around his head]: i can't tie a damn turban. this must take so long... i would be so angry if i were those guys, i mean - i feel all dressed up and no where to go. wtf?!


visiting ben's female friend: wait, jeremy knows about girls?
nate: actually, he's quite partial to some guy smut.
cait: wait - i know where his stash is.
nate lifts armchair in living room to reveal the deck of cards with naked men on them*
nate: let's plaster his room with them!
visitor: put them in his books for a special surprise in class!
collective 'YEAH!'
nate places a few in the books, include one in the holy bible. a final one is about to be placed under jeremy's pillow.. but WAIT!
nate: there's already one here!? WHAT?! JEREMY! WHY is there the joker with his tie cock UNDER YOUR PILLOW!?
singing to jeremy: antoine quit playing, why don't you back that ass up
ben [studying his french 1 book]: la jupe
jeremy [incredulously, discovering the naked card placed in the bible]: its in the book of kings!
nate [in a god-like voice]: "and he said..."
ben [to nate, who is now placing the cards in the microwave]: dude, are you gonna put them in the microwave?!
nate: you dont think they're microwave safe?
nate [to ben's friend]: you're never coming back here are you?

end the insanity

*that's right, naked men cards exist in nate's apartment.

Cait* 1:29 AM link it! 0 comments

Monday, October 23, 2006
Joe Mathlete Explains Today's Marmaduke

Joe Mathlete Explains Today's Marmaduke: makes me laugh.

Cait* 3:27 PM link it! 0 comments

Saturday, October 14, 2006
thunder, lightning, snow?

for those of you who don't live in western new york, we got hit with a freak snow storm (complete with lightning and thunder) thursday night and it's been called a "National Disaster" at worst.

over 400,000 people were out of power and now that its stopped snowing, our area looks like its been hit by a hurricane - trees are broken and now houses are flooding - the Thruway was closed for 105 miles! And then they did the impossible and closed UB for Friday! its the first time in 5-6 years they've had a snow day.

luckily, our apartment has power, but the people without power have been told it may take up to A WEEK to restore power.

here's my little view of the storm as it passed by us: covered cars

2:45pm - starting to snow (at this point we were all like "wtf. it was 60 degrees out this morning!")

3:30pm - Starting to get serious
More snow!

8:00pm - got home from beta.. is it going to stop?
9pm:  When Will it Stop?!

10:00pm - Tonanwanda has declared a driving ban and a state of emergency in Amherst
10pm:  State of Emergency

AFTER - school's cancelled

8:00am - starting to snow again :(
8am - more snow

10:00am - going over to nate's, i spy creepy looking trees over the tops of the cars
creepy broken trees

11:00am - jeremy has his own lake
jeremy's personal lake

SATURDAY 10:30am - broken trees around UB
broken trees

poor tree.. our tree didn't make it
poor tree :(

Cait* 1:33 PM link it! 0 comments

Tuesday, October 10, 2006
lack luster

i noticed that my journal was getting mopey as of late*, so i need something to make it less mopey. so far i have... nothing.

nothing really funny has happened lately. its really too bad, cause i would love to have some humor. hmm.

i guess the best thing i could do is throw up** some pictures i took recently. blahhhhh

so here's a picture of me playing a sweet rock guitar:
no longer having to play air guitar

and here's one of upstate/western new york:
the swamp sticks

and here's one with nate:
who wouldn't want nate's head on a platter

sorry i'm boring. deal.

*who says "as of late"? probably the same person that would call something "a stitch". oh that johnny fellow is such a stitch! tee hee hee. and if you're wondering who i'm talking about, its nate.

**"throw up" is one of those phrases like "shoot you an email" that i really can't stand, yet still use. "give you a call-back" (said as if callback was one word) is another one.

Cait* 5:43 PM link it! 0 comments

Sunday, October 08, 2006
reason why i love nate #147

he's the only person who ever begins a phone conversation with "hey fatass" and somehow manages to end it with "bye sweetheart" and is still alive.

Cait* 3:34 PM link it! 0 comments

Wednesday, October 04, 2006
poop reference!

whenever i read the word "defalcation", i think "defecation", which makes reading audit homework either hilarious, or completely disgusting.

for example: "...control over related assest, as this raises the possibility of defalcation."

and there i am, giggling like a 9 year old boy. or like nate.

Cait* 10:19 PM link it! 0 comments

voidable k

if my boyfriend loved me, i would not be typing this journal entry.

if i actually did anything with my life, i would be doing audit homework right now.

scratch that. if i actually did anything with my life i would be doing something other than audit homework or typing this journal entry right now.

if sara loved me, she would not be calling phil to come over and be her mechanical fixer replacement.

if i loved my body, i would take it for walks and maybe letting it go to the gym instead of stuffing it full of crap.

my life is a deep dark loveless void.

Cait* 9:14 PM link it! 0 comments


blahhh october already blahhhh

i hate school.

i hate exams (which hating school kind of encapsulates, but i'm not in the mood for being all philosophical like exam is a quintessential part of "school" and what is "school" at its most essential basic part? what is it to "learn". blahhh)

nate has an xbox.


nate has replaced me with an xbox.


Cait* 12:18 AM link it! 0 comments